This past weekend (after trying to watch The Walking Dead and realizing that it was far too gruesome for me – he cut off his own hand, what?!), I stumbled upon an oddball film which has been on my mind since seeing it. The Giant Mechanical Man focuses on two 30-somethings that have hit a rough patch in their lives – low income, failing relationships, unsure about what they want for their lives – you can imagine the situation. The take-away message from the film is that it only takes one person to make you feel special, worthwhile, as if you belong.
The message caught me off guard. In the film, the leading lady is constantly bombarded with messages that she should have things figured out. Her family routinely tells her what she is doing wrong, Her boss fires her after telling her why she is not good for the company, Her landlord evicts her after telling her why she is not good for the building – she is persistently reminded of all the ways in which she is not goo enough.
Does this feeling ring any bells for the rest of you? After years in graduate school, I have often fallen into the habit of sending the same message to myself and those around me. I remind myself what I could be doing differently – taking on more projects, seeing more clients, publishing more papers, going to more conferences, being more involved with the community, walking my dog more, doing more yoga, and the list never ends. There are endless ways to be reminded that we need to be doing more.
How do you fight this feeling? How do you stop the endless stream of messages long enough to remind yourselves that you are worthy, that you are important, that you are doing a good job at… just being you? That is where our friends, family, and loved ones have the most important role. It only takes one person to make you feel valued, important, worthy. So let it start it with you.
Instead, take the day to remind yourself that it only takes one person to make you feel worthy – and be that person for someone. I can still remember the first time someone told me they love me unconditionally. We often think that is a given when we express love, but saying those words to another person can be powerful. For me, it was my grandmother, and I can still remember the way my breath caught in my throat when she said it. I had never though of love in that way. Her unconditional love made me feel special, important, worthy.
Take the day. Remind others that your love is unconditional. Maybe then, we will stop focusing on what more we can do, so that we can simply start rocking out at just being our awesome selves.
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One Thought About It Only Takes One
Wonderful challenge. Will strive to achieve. Laura, thanks for sharing.